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How to Manage Conflict


Omniagroup.(n.d).Leadership, Conflict Management Style [illustration]. Retrieved from http:/www.omniagroup.com/leadership-conflict-management-style/

 

I felt I lived in a world where people, who are overly aggressive, usually are the first heads that will roll in any professional setting. Be it in the political arena or in the workplace, aggressive people usually don’t last long. In my many years of experience dealing with different kinds people of varying personalities, cultural backgrounds, religious beliefs and many other factors, conflict usually arises because of these aggressive people.

I believe with a firm stand, conflict is unavoidable like the direction of the winds in the sea. I can do nothing about the wind, but I can always steer the boat in the direction that I wish by adjusting its sail. The struggle between the boat and the winds is no different in real life. I will encounter conflict in every aspect of life, it is the last thing I can control but I have the power to minimize conflict by understanding the person involved in the conflict. Understanding by no means of succumbing to his or her whims always. What I mean by that is, looking at the person with a compassionate eye. By asking my self: What makes this person aggressive? What drives the person to behave in such way? What might the person’s history that made him or her the person they became? Perhaps, with a little background checking done in a subtle way, I can help create a harmonious working environment and lasting friendships because of my initiative and emotional malleability.

 

Also, generosity and kindness can help disarm aggressive people. Time and effort can be offered that have more weight than material things and will make a positive impression even to the most hardened aggressive people. But then again, it is not guaranteed that aggressive people will not antagonize me, or conflict will not rise despite the best of my efforts.

 

When I have done my best efforts, and start to hear the grit on my teeth and still the person won’t stop being aggressive, I can turn a table, smash a desk, or simply look them in the eye to amplify a message that they have worn out my patience and they have stretched me too much. Most of the times the results are magical and mysterious. To make them think that they have a long fight ahead of them if they won’t leave me alone is one of my best methods to minimize and manage conflict. By that, I knew I have earned their respect. It works for me, it might not work for everybody.

About Manalo James Ryan

James Ryan Manalo is from Mexico, Pampanga, Philippines. He now lives in Calgary Alberta with his wife Dulce and son Elijah.

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